Wednesday, October 23, 2013

I'm still into you

What should I do? Chasing Lufthansa is not helping me, making me sorrow. Crying over things which you will not get doesn't help you to over come them.

The hell, I don't know, but I WANT HIM. I want to see him. How can I reach him? I just want to see once, just once. Let me, God, let me. I cannot find peace for as long as I cannot see him. I need to see him. Or else at least deviate my attention...please do something. Nowadays, I look like a dead person; my eyes don't show any kind of life. They look dead. 

It is just so bad; you can make him forget about me, but not the other way around. I cannot join Lufthansa; I am not eligible to become FA in many ways, and until he came that was not even my dream, but still why do I feel sick that I'm ineligible for Lufthansa. I cannot go to Frankfurt in search for him. Please do something - I WANT TO SEE HIM. Everyday I'm patiently waiting for the craziness to go away, but I'm becoming worst. I long for him. I think about him every single day. 

Please help me forget Lufthansa or anything related to it. How can I forget about them, when I'm following them on twitter. I can't stop! I need to know the truth. I've to solve this unsolved mystery. I've to know who he is, what his likes/dislikes, what are his mannerisms, his everyday life, his history, his future plans.....Anything related to him, I need to know from German language to Frankfurt to German culture. I am overwhelmed with this affair. Wish you could feel my pain.Timberlake's lyrics are buzzing in my head:

"And baby
It's amazing I'm in this maze with you
I just can't crack your code
One day you screaming you love me loud
The next day you're so cold
One day you here, one day you there
One day you care, you're so unfair"

And that's it, today's cry is over, back to real life! That is how it is - I switch off my emotions like a switch - on/off. 

I think, I really love him, like even though I don't know anything about him. That day he was like my mirror, whatever feelings I was feeling for him, he showed it on his face. We were so connected, just like that in an instant. Wish I knew at that time, that I'll cry over him in the future. I MISS YOU DEARLY! 

Today's cry goes to Hungarian girl, who soon will have telephone interview for Lufthansa flight attendant post. As she itches closer, I feel miserable for being far away from my hope😔.

"Makes me feel like I can't live without you.
It takes me all the way.
I want you to stay.

Ooh, ooh, ooh, the reason I hold on
Ooh, ooh, ooh, 'cause I need this hole gone."

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